Out with the Old, in with the New(er)…Binders, that is…

January 6th, 2010

For most kids, its the first week back at school after a somewhat restful break eating, sleeping and hanging out with friends. For some students it is the start of the new semester – a great time for a fresh slate and clean start. This week actually sets the tone for the rest of the semester – here’s how to do it right…

Schedule a time to recycle, re-assess, and replenish.

Just like basketball practice or flute lessons, schedule the time where you and your children go through your old papers, recycle what is not needed, and create folders for papers that should be saved but don’t necessarily need to be in the backpack anymore (last semester’s finals for example).

Recycle – all old papers that are no longer useful, triplicate copies of assignments, hall passes from last semester etc.

Re-assess – Look at all the binders, planners and backpacks – are they still usable and useful. Perhaps your child has new classes this semester and needs new binders for them – also, despite your child’s claims,  Chorus and Religion class most certainly need binders.

Replenish – Its the night before a big project and you child need’s scissors and a glue stick, both of which are missing. That is generally not the time that you want to be going to the supply store. The beginning of the New Year is a great time to stock up on index cards (to make flashcards), reinforced binder paper (that doesn’t rip easily), a new three-hole punch if your old one is missing or is dog-eared, and printer paper.

May this semester be your child’s most successful one yet!

Monday Rec – Jeanmarie Cahill’s Talk

January 4th, 2010

So, I decided that Monday is the day that I recommend things – books, talks, movies, whatever applicable in my work with students…and this Monday I recommend Jeanmarie Cahill’s talk for parents this Tuesday night. Jeanmarie is a MFT who works with adolescents in the Bay Area and was one of my favorite professors when I was getting my Masters in Counseling at USF. All of the information is below, but please note that space is limited, so RSVP to education@doctorcarlton.com.

Teens in Trouble: How to Know When Your Teen Needs Help

Please join Dr. Pamela Carlton for an ongoing Free Education Program For Parents of Teens and Young Adults.

Teens today are burdened by more stress than teens of years past. Teenagers are forced to confront increases in stress on several fronts: school, athletics, extracurricular activities, relationships, technology and employment, while simultaneously responding physically, mentally and emotionally to the challenges that accompany normal adolescent development.  The parents of a teenager and those who work with teenagers, on a regular basis, must remain on the alert for signals that a teenager is in trouble and needs support through this critical period of their life and specifically in dealing with their stress.

This presentation will focus on helping parents, and those who work with teenagers, determine when a teenager
needs help, how to provide that help and how to go about getting outside help.

Jeanmarie Cahill, MFT
A New York City native, Jeanmarie Cahill, MFT has lived in the San Francisco Bay Area for 22 years.  She holds both a BA and MA in Psychology and is a licensed Marriage Family Therapist, MFT. Currently Jeanmarie is in private practice in Los Gatos and is an adjunct professor at the University of San Francisco.   Jeanmarie’s specialty is working with adolescents and their families.

Date: Tuesday January 5, 2010 at 7:00pm-8:30pm

Place: 2490 Hospital Drive, Suite 205, Mountain View, CA 94040
(pass they YMCA and as the road turns to the left, the office is located on the right, across from the Women’s Hospital.

College Corner – Deadlines Are Closer than They Appear

January 1st, 2010

This week, the NY Times published this piece on a University of Chicago Dean of Admissions who sent out a successful college essay to other applicants. Some students and adults complained about the sultry tone of the essay, but mostly, I think kids found that reading others essays so close to the deadline left them second-guessing their own abilities.

As deadlines loom (and there are still quite a few schools whose applications are due in the next few days!) students sometimes find themselves doubting themselves or feeling overwhelmed when they read the work of others. After all, most people on a tight deadline would second-guess themselves as it is, and teenagers probably fare far worse.

My advice to my students is generally to start early (in the early fall), come up with a several potential topics, and then read a few sample essays from a book like Edward Fiske’s Real College Essays That Work. I like Fiske’s book because students tend to find the essays approachable and real.

Some of the best essays I’ve read have been on seemingly small, slice-of-life or moment-in-time pieces – a conversation at a Day Worker’s Center, thoughts on driving one’s sister to ballet class and the challenges of listening to a tone-deaf brother play the drums. I can’t say there is no wrong topic, but there are many more right ones than students (and parents) tend to realize.

New Year, New Semester, New Goals!

December 31st, 2009

Happy 2010!

For most students, the beginning of the year is also the beginning of a new semester – and with that, comes the opportunity for a fresh set of personal and academic goals. For pre-teens and teenagers, focusing on specific, achievable goals that can happen over the next semester can be more motivating and realistic than making five- or ten-year goals.

Ask your child what academic and personal goals they have – and make it a family affair – perhaps start by having each person write down two academic and two personal goals for the semester, and then spend a few moments each coming up with the things that need to happen in order for those goals to be achieved.

For instance, perhaps your fifteen-and-a-half year old’s goal is to get his driver’s license. The things that need to happen in order to achieve the goal include taking driver’s ed, getting his permit, doing behind the wheel training, and scheduling the exam with the DMV. Breaking goals down into smaller steps make them seem less daunting and more achievable.

Each semester in our office, our students spend a a few moments writing down their goals – and are able to achieve amazing things, often exceeding their own wildest dreams. It begins with first admitting what their goals are, which enables them to set the path to achieve them.

Good luck and May your 2010 be the start of your most AMAZING decade yet!